Hey guys! Today Stacy tell her real life story why she is afraid of people. "Today, talks about stress, psychological traumas and all that jazz are a trend. Even a truest office dweller sometimes reads books on psychology. Then, he'll be looking for everything he’d read inside. And then, he would find half of that. My medical history's started with such a trauma. People’ve been developing this until I've got what I got.
So, I was sitting in the sandbox. And a man in a long coat came up. He showed us... well, this thing. We yelled, not out of fear, but out of misunderstanding of what was going on. Even the boys screamed. The 'rents ran up and took the nude guy away.
I wasn't scared then. Maybe a little disgusted. But I remembered it. I still couldn't get why the naked guy came up to us. When I grew up, I got it. But the disgusting feeling remained. And when I played, I always looked around. You never know, maybe someone else'll come up.
People continued to traumatise me. I was 10 then. I trusted people but a bit cautiously. Thanks to the news, and a coupla fights right in our neighborhood when drunk guys went to knuckle. A drunk husband pulled the wife in a robe by her hair. It impressed me so much. And a few weeks after, I'd been waking up from nightmares.
No one in my family drank or cursed. Mum and dad are normal people. They don't suffer from anything. They work, go to the countryside for the weekend and bring me up. Of course, they tried to protect me from any bad shows. But I'm not to wear blinds on my eyes! They tried to explain such things to me. But, by that time, I stopped trusting people.
The man told me to join them. My imagination's too good. So I vomited right on the pavement. Then I ran away like a crazy. No one was going to chase me. But it wasn't any better. I wanted to run as far away as I could. I wanted to wash myself with something like sandpaper. And maybe poke my eyes out.…
If it hadn't been for my previous experience, everything'd been okay. Anyway, nothing happened. But I started to be afraid of communication with boys. Any scene like kissing made me vomit. I saw in the underground some couples who did it. Once, I vomited after looking at them... I hope it's taught them not to show their affection in public.
I was also afraid of men and their intentions. My 'rents took me to the psychologist. But how to avoid stress if the local news always show all sorts of horrors? And they all were real. And so I got a strange hobby - finding a proof for TV news.
I was carefully choosing out the most shocking news. Then, I was looking for traces of people described there. I did it all by myself. Thanks to the Internet, I could look for any information just by clicking. Once, I even helped a girl to find a thief who stole almost all the things from her. Her friends' photos helped. She wanted to thank me. But I didn't accept it.
What could go wrong? It was for the hens. I once came to visit my favorite neighbors. The old lady treated me to pies. Her husband went somewhere. I asked where he had gone. The old lady said he'd be back soon.
And he came back, with two plucked chickens with no heads. Oh my gosh! Well, I understand where the delicious chicken in my plate comes from. But to understand and to see are different things. Especially when you feed these creatures. And you see them in the soup.
I cried and ran away. Mum apologised for a long time. I was going through another emotional crisis. And I thought even the most harmless people'd be evil ones. If the old man with a funny white beard kills his pets without hesitation, what prevents him to come to our house at night? With the same sarcastic smile, he'd stop our living! I insisted on going back to the city. At least, there're the four walls and an iron door.
Parents had to agree. Now, another psychologist's working with me. And at the same time, he's a psychiatrist. There're enough problems in my head. Sometimes I think it'd be easier to settle in my imagination and stop contacting the world. But I feel sorry for my parents".
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