Hello! My name is Michelle, I am seventeen years old. My story is about a broken heart and a tremendous amount of stress, which I experienced and, as it seems to me, made me stronger. This is a story about the death of my online boyfriend and how it changed the future of two people. And I hope these changes will be for the better. For about six months, I had a long distance relationship with a guy named Daniel. We met on the Internet on a specific message board. It was an old fashioned board, where people still preferred to hide their real names behind nicknames, and real life photos behind pretty pictures. Daniel and I started a conversation, which we continued in private. For a while we were just chatting, until I began to share some very personal things with Dan. I began to trust this guy a lot, perhaps even more than I trusted my friends in real life.
At the same time, Daniel told me practically nothing about himself. I just knew that he and I both lived in Texas, but in different cities. I also knew that Dan was a little older than me. But this only made him more attractive for me – so far every relationship with a guy of my age had ended disastrously for me. And I also liked the halo of mystery surrounding Daniel. He did not have a single account on the internet where he would show his real name or post his real photos. This I could easily relate to — only six photos had appeared on my poor Instagram in two years. But Dan, for some reason, did not want to show me what he looked like even in private messages. Nor did he want to meet with me in real life. Or even just talk to me on Skype, so that I could hear his voice. I was a little frustrated, but still did not perceive it as a problem. I thought that everything would happen when the timing was right. And it never occurred to me that Dan might not be who he seemed at all. I rather imagined that perhaps Dan was very ugly or unhealthy... I could only guess. But all this was not important to me. For me, the inner world of a person really matters much more than their outer shell.
Well… when I received a phone call from a number unknown to me, I saw no reason to not believe what a rather unpleasant female voice told me. The voice belonged to somebody named Danielle and, making sure that I was Michelle, she said that Dan had passed away. Danielle told me that she was Dan’s twin sister, hence the similar names, and added that she knew about her brother’s relationship with me. According to her, Dan had been terminally ill for quite a long time, and that was the reason he did not want to see me, but now, everything was over. He was dead.
After that, Danielle hung up. I tried several times to call her back to at least find out the details, but she did not pick up the phone. This might seem strange, but I really was in love with Dan. Everything was real for me, so just imagine how you would feel if your boyfriend or girlfriend died. I sometimes read our chats in messengers and, of course, I saw that Dan never showed-up as “online” again. But on the message board where we met, his account ... was online after Danielle’s call. I sent Dan a message, but of course there was no answer. Later I thought that it was probably his sister or one of his friends who was using Dan's laptop and the message board page had simply opened by default ... But I still could not get it out of my head. I wanted to know more!
I only had Danielle's phone number, so I decided to start with searching it on the internet. Not really hoping for success, of course, but what if I got lucky? I used different search engines and web archives, until finally I saw a match. This number was used in some pretty old ad for the sale of some junk on Craigslist. The announcement was clearly outdated, but it indicated a specific address for pickup. I had no other options. The next weekend I went to the neighboring city to visit this address.
There I saw a rather ordinary house, not very large in size. I worked up all my courage and knocked on the door. I don’t know what I was expecting but definitely not what happened next... a child opened the door for me. But there was a boy who was about twelve who, seriously and even a little sternly, asked me who I was. Another boy, five years younger, peered out from behind him. I asked them to call an adult, when suddenly a short woman who was about thirty appeared and stood between the children and me. I recognized her voice. It sounded better live, but it was definitely the voice of Danielle. I introduced myself and suddenly Danielle told me to leave.
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